Waiting for you..

Hours in front of a screen,

Willing it to change from last seen to seen,

Every second a million heart beats,

Your words are my only treat.

Seconds to minutes to hours to days,

Waiting to see your beautiful display picture face.

Friends or more?

Is it love? Did I score?

At last I see the ‘typing..’ word,

Will I be a crushed or a love bird?

-Nithya❤️

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The climb

The will to live, a reason to die,

Heaving the burden, I let out a big sigh.

Struggling to go on, wanting to give up,

An option to go back ,

Ever present in front as a Bait.

Huffing and puffing, break the obstacles,

End in sight, omnipresence of excitement lingering everywhere.

A backpack on shoulder, a stick in hand,

Small victory achieved, happiness engulfing my world.

The sun shines bright on my face,

Alas I win my life’s most important race.

-Nithya❤️

The rain 

A dull day

Pitter patter of rain

Strolling aimlessly

I stand at my secret haven

Countless choices at hand

Yet i see the same face.

There she stands,

Same as me , but with a warm smile.

Ah that comfort on a tortured mind.

With matching umbrellas we stand still.

A moment, one heartbeat,

Rush into each other arms.

Years separated us due to misunderstandings,

Now we unite as maturity ripened.

Lived as two, but we are one.

Yes, she back,

My one and only twin.
-Nithya❤️

Life

If wings could fly, i would

Life is never easy,

At every stage of life, 

Broken at some point, i stood.

Tears, a precious gem,

In abundance it flowed.

Wealth never an obstacle,

Happiness, a hallucination 

Like a drop of water in an endless 

desert.

Becoming stronger never an option,

For it was an ultimatum in living a life.
-Nithya❤️

Fashion and me.

Fashion a word that excites most women and men too. The struggle to be up to date with fashion and put up all ‘professional’ pictures has taken over the world of blogging by storm.

Fashion according to me is personalized feature. What you want to wear and how you want to wear is upto you. Yes you may offend a whole number of ‘fashionistas’ but then ultimately if you are comfortable in what you are wearing and basically comfortable in your skin that makes fashion for you.

Am not a Fashionista or anybody significant for that matter. I used to feel fat most of my life and my eyes and heart always envied a lot of hep and beautiful ladies out there wearing all sort of clothes which I would not wear. It was not I could not but just that I was NOT WILLING to even try them out.

All that changed when I got married. My husband was an ever supportive person and helped me lose a few kgs which instantly boosted a bit of my confidence.

Now I am open to trying new, hep clothes too and hope I succeed in future with a load of other new stuff. 

Always a struggle but with a will to try to change.

With love and little bit of sorrow

Always in the dark about new fashion,

NITHYA. 😂

TO BE OR NOT TO BE -Part 4

Part 4 -Trapped
Hurrying to straighten myself i pushed Lisa away and stretched my hands to embrace Vihaan. 
“Mommy were you kissing Lisa aunty just now?”, Vihaan asked with a confused look.
“No baby, dust had gone into Aunty’s eyes i was just blowing it away.”
“Ok mom.”
Patting his head on my shoulder I struggled to calm myself before i lost control. Control was the one stable thing in my ever changing life.
Lisa smiled her Devilish smile and proceeded to sleep peacefully feeling accomplished. 
Landing and check out process went ahead with no drama and we headed towards our pick up.
The pick up was in a van which puzzled me since I had expected a private car for our mission. As it turned out our mission was not as I expected.
The van contained around 10 people all into their own worlds already. Choosing my place carefully I headed to the back of the van , which was as far away from Lisa I could get.
Vihaan tired from travel remained quiet and settled down to sleep on my shoulder as soon as I sat down. 
As the van started , an announcement was made which shocked me.
” Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to your new adventure which will change your course of lives not just for the period of time that you are with us but after this too. The FBI sincerely welcomes all its interns for a life changing experience.”
“FBI??? I thought they were sending me for an important mission atleast that’s what I was told… WTH…”
I got up to leave , when I felt a hand on my thighs. That familiar touch and immediate goosebumps on my skin. 
” Hello Rita, how have you been?”
I turned my head to gaze into his beautiful brown eyes and fall head over heels for him again. 
To be continued…..💕

To be or not to be -Part 3

Part 3- Agonising feelings 
“So from when have you been assigned to my case?”
“Oh from when they knew that you were going to be assigned to it!!”, She smirked.
“You requested that you be assigned or …”
“No idea what you are hinting at.”
Rolling my eyes I dragged my tired body and mind to sit in front of departure gate. 
The call for boarding was made on schedule to my relief and we sat down in our alloted seat. To my utter dismay Lisa was right next to me.
She smiled and settled down with a book to read. I chose to ignore her since I didn’t want to irritate myself further than I already was. 
As the plane took off my senses calmed and I closed my eyes for a nap keeping an ear out for Vihaan. Just as I was about to fall asleep I felt a hand on my thighs. Startled I woke up.
When I looked at who it was I was surprised to find Lisa sitting close to me and looking into my eyes with pure lust.
Taken aback with the intensity of the gaze I was confused what reaction to give . My initial response was to ignore her advances but then what I had gone through made me rethink my response.
Do I dare to release my innermost feelings still present for her or do I just show a casual interest and engage in a one night stand? 
Before the mind could decide the body had already started the action. Two full lips clashed together to form an explosion so intense it seemed as if rocking the whole plane.
Suppressed feelings slowly raised it’s head. Hands traced a familiar path they had travelled before. 
Forgetting the present we went to our own planets as we usually do as things started more intense, a pull on my dress was made.
Squatting away the hand I proceeded to ravage her mouth. Again the pull. Annoyed at the disturbance I opened my eyes to Vihaans confused look.

To be continued…..💕

To be or not to be -Part 2

Part 2- Old habits die hard
“Oh crap”, I mumbled.
“What is that my dear?”, Lisa asked.
“Nothing”
“Hi hi , Momma who is this aunty?” , my son asked shaking Lisa’s outstretched hand like a water pump. 
“Vihaan , leave that hand alone or you are going rip it off its socket!!!”, I admonished him with stern eyes.
“Cool!!!”
He sulked and started playing with his tennis ball.
“Hi Lisa, I would love to stay and chat but as you can see I am in bit of a hurry now. See you later.”
I didn’t wait for her answer and dragged Vihaan and my luggage once again to the check in counter. 
Successfully checking in later I breathed out the air that I had been holding onto nervously for so long. Just as I sat down with all my energy drained out I heard a voice once more which made me jump out of my skin.
“You didn’t think you could run away so easily from me , huh?”
With irritated eyes I turned to reply when I saw Lisa AGAIN.
“What the heck is matter with you Lisa? If I told no to you once, can’t you understand it? Which part of NO can you not understand?”
“I didn’t want this too… But unfortunately or fortunately I am ur ‘partner in crime’ for this mission.”
I couldn’t believe my ears. Whoever I didn’t want to meet kept coming back to haunting me.
Anger filling my face and eyes I stared at her face. Her face always a sign of calmness and serenity started showing signs of worry and underlying excitement. 
Strangely I was having an excitement too in all my anger. Remembering our past relationship I was getting all riled up. With Vihaans pulling of my skirt I was jolted back into the present.
To be continued…..💕
To be or not to be -Prologue

To be or not to be -Part 1

To be or not to be -Part 1

Part 1 – Who I am and Who will I be?
The journey to the train station was as event less as it could get. Apart from the fact that my son has inherited my boyfriend’s annoying habit of chattering non stop when on travel. 
“Momma look at that building, see see a limo… A cute girl momma !!! ”
I paused my thoughts with the last comment of his and stared at his face with incredulity. 
“What are they teaching you at school young man?” 
“Nothing momma!!”
Again that puppy dog face he perennially uses to calm me down. With a sigh of exasperation I turned my head back to the busy streets.
My eyes though wandering aimlessly on the streets caught sight of a familiar face staring at me as we passed by. My breath caught in my throat as it was HIM. The one guy whom I wanted to avoid meeting before I started on my adventure was standing right in front of me.
A lame effort of hiding behind a very transparent glass was made. My son , an over enthusiast that he was waved at everyone he could lay his eyes on. 
My desperation to get to the airport only got worse and traffic was not being my friend right now. An inch by inch movement made my second more agonising than the previous.
Ions of travel time later we finally reached our destination on time and I ran dragging my luggage and my son when I banged into someone.
Luggage, my son and me fell in different directions. With panic in my eyes, I frantically reached for my son. 
” Well , well if it isn’t the famous criminal Rita” a female voice whispered in my ears.
My panic worsening into a panic attack with the voice I raised my head to look into HERs my ex-girlfriend….
To be continued…..💕